here on the PLANET, in order to build further community, we have 7 types of Babe. we wonder:
which one r u?
Please note that these roles are for female, lesbian, intersex, non-binary, trans* and agender folk. Those not of these categories are Honorary Babes, and must be aware of the space they take up.
All images below were found on Pinterest; all are copyright their respective owners.
ANGEL BABES
Heavenly creature looking down on the world with love – when your head’s not in the clouds!
Telltale traits: pink, lace, pink lace, a Lana Del Rey vinyl, a thick skin from being called “bratty” umpteen times
Stereotypical sun sign: Libra
Most likely to: describe things as “Lynchean” despite having never seen Lost Highway
CLOWN BABES
The PLANET’s dirtiest rascals. Expect the unexpected from them.
Telltale traits: a Chappell Roan vinyl, a red nose, two best friends named Lucy and Yak who also happen to be your personal stylists
Stereotypical sun sign: Gemini, Sagittarius
Most likely to: describe themselves as a “silly goose” because they think they’re like the goose from Untitled Goose Game even though they’re more like Jemima Puddle-Duck
CRYSTAL BABES
Magical, mystical, spellbinding and entrancing. Here to captivate – and capture.
Telltale traits: baths full of rose petals (preferably made of marble); Chani Nicholas and Annabel Gat on their bookshelves, any oracle card deck that isn’t the Britney one, crystals (obvs)
Stereotypical sun sign: Scorpio, Capricorn
Most likely to: if rich, go to Burning Man (because Boomtown and/or Shambala didn’t leave them satisfied. Can’t blame them). if poor, go to Slimelight (because Torture Garden didn’t leave them satisfied. Can’t blame them.)
FAIRY BABES
Grounded in nature, sprinkling pixie dust wherever you go.
Telltale traits: a love of nature, a love of Mitski (even if their favourite Lorde album is Solar Power), the need to yearn, the urge to pair up with a Crystal Babe and attempt to forage a few liberty caps in Epping Forest somehow
Stereotypical sun sign: Taurus, Virgo
Most likely to: be a veeeee-gan. With five e’s.
HOT BABES
Made of fire and the sun’s warmth. Others melt in your presence.
Telltale traits: Incubal/succubal looks, an “outspoken” personality that fades once ordering at the Dalston Dixy Chicken, something in their bag that will blacken their lungs once inhaled
Stereotypical sun sign: Aries, Leo
Most likely to: have commited to the Brat Summer bit
MER BABES
Always ready to make a splash. Helps things go swimmingly.
Telltale traits: a calming presence, a tail, a need to defend Azealia Banks just because she had a seapunk phase in 2013, an almost corvid need for shimmery stuff
Stereotypical sun sign: Pisces, Cancer
Most likely to: own a Stanley cup, in the greigest shade of greige, as a holdover from their VSCO flask days
SPACE BABES
Comes in peace. A real star child. Gorgeously galactic.
Telltale traits: an effortless cool, a spot on the Mums Against Donk guestlist, a pair of Oakleys that somehow don’t transform you into a typical 60-year-old Republican named Mike
Stereotypical sun sign: Aquarius
Most likely to: be a regular at Unfold. Or FOLD in general.